Best Jack Sparrow Quotes

I'm a big fan. Here are some of his best quotes, some inspirational and some hopefully not so.

"I have no sympathy for any of you feculent maggots and no more patience to pretend otherwise. Gentlemen, I wash my hand of this weirdness. "

"If you choose to lock your heart away you'll lose it for certain."

"Not all treasure is silver and gold."

"Ladies, will you please shut it! Listen to me. Yes, I lied to you.  No, I don't love you. Of course it makes you look fat. I've never been to Brussels. It is pronounced egregious. By the way, no. I've never actually met Pizarro, but I love his pies. And all of this pales to utter insignificance in light of the fact that my ship is once again gone. Savvy?"

"If I may lend a machete to your intellectual thicket."

"Shoot. Save me the bother of the fall."

"Seeing as you're still alive, I say it was very successful."

"William, tell me somethin'. Have you come because you need my help to save a certain distressin' damsel? Or... damsel in distress? Either one."

"Why fight when you can negotiate?"

Elizabeth: "There will come a time when you have a chance to do the right thing."

Jack: "I love those moments. I like to wave at them as they pass by."

"You mistrust me? Listen, you can mistrust him, trust me. "

"Guard the boat, mind the tide... don't touch my dirt."

Gibbs: "Let's put some distance between us and this island and head out to open sea!"

Jack: "Yes to the first, yes to the second, but only insofar as we keep to the shallows as much as possible."

Gibbs: "That seems a bit contradictory, Captain."

Jack: "I have every faith in your reconciliatory navigational skills, Mr. Gibbs, now where is that monkey, I want to shoot something!"

"This is the day you will always remember as the day you almost caught Captain Jack Sparrow!"

"She's safe, just like I promised. She's all set to marry Norrington, just like she promised. And you get to die for it just like you promised. So we are all men of our word really. Except for, of course, Elizabeth, who is, in fact, a woman."

"No. You want you to find this, because the finding of this finds you incapacitorially finding and or locating in your discovering the detecting of a way to save your dolly belle, ol' what's-her-face. Savvy? "

"No survivors? Then where do the stories come from, I wonder?"

"The only rules that really matter are these: what a man can do and what a man can't do."

Norintgon: "You are without doubt the worst pirate I've ever heard of."

Jack: "But you have heard of me."

"Of the two of us, I am the only one who hasn't committed mutiny, therefore my word is the one we'll be trusting."

"Me? I'm dishonest, and a dishonest man you can always trust to be dishonest. Honestly. It's the honest ones you want to watch out for, because you can never predict when they're going to do something incredibly stupid."

"Bring me that horizon."

Will Turner: "This is either madness... or brilliance." 

Jack Sparrow: "It's remarkable how often those two traits coincide."

Pintel: "You? You're supposed to be dead."

Jack Sparrow: "Am I not?"